I have a confession to make.
I am a recovering Debbie downer. I never looked for the silver lining. I saw half-empty glasses all around me. Probably from a combination of anxiety and depression dating back to my tween years, I tended to look on the not-so-bright side. The dark side. Imagining the worst and expecting it to happen.
I was on the constant look out for the disapproving look or snub or veiled insult. And boy, did I find them! A frown on a stranger’s face meant she didn’t like me. If someone didn’t say hi, it meant they hated me.
All this negativity did not help. It kept me sheltered from hurt but also cut off opportunities that could have given me great joy! Like friendships or work opportunities or just a fun time out with friends.
Fast-forward 3 decades
After a painful divorce and entire re-evaluation of my life (hello mid-life crisis!), everything I thought I knew came into question. To me, ending a 14-year marriage and having to start my life over as a single mama was a nightmare come true!
It wasn’t until after I grieved the loss of a marriage and my life as a stay-at-home mom and wife (with the help of therapy, lots of tears and dozens and dozens of self-help books) that I began to notice that I had a lot to be grateful for.
And for the first time in my life, I started to clean up my negativity and automatic negative thoughts. And that’s when my life began to transform.
Count your blessings (even the ones that don’t seem like blessings)
First, I began to literally count my blessings. Spelling them out. Journaling about the good things in my life – even if on that particular day I could only summon up the obvious. like the fact that I had my two beautiful girls in my life or that I had a roof over my head.
Even the hardships could be mined for blessings. The end of an unhappy marriage led to happier life (eventually). And the chance to rebuild our family in a healthier way.
Then, after consistently appreciating the things I already had, I began to *expect* more good things to happen to me.
Now I look for the miracle. The good. The bright side. The love. And oh boy, they are showing up!
I feel lighter than I ever have. I have more hope than I ever have. I feel more *myself* than I ever have. And the world seems to have opened up!
Of course, I still have off days. Fears. Resistance. But those days are just that. Off days. They aren’t in alignment with who I am.
And after a pint of gelato or a Netflix binge or if I am really good, a yoga class or an evening run, I return to love. My perception returns to love and the world reflects that love back to me.
And that is what my new collection, Grateful Heart, means to me. Being grateful for what you have. Because I believe what you focus on will grow! Having gratitude will raise your vibration – no more Debbie downer vibes for me – and attract even more things to be grateful for.
The Grateful Heart collection is now available on my Catshy Crafts online shop and my Catshy Crafts Etsy shop.